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DINNER AND A MOVIE IN DOWNTOWN LA!!!

Stan Lerner — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 05:39:02 +0000

Foreword by Stan Lerner: I was born and raised in Los Angeles, which is truly one of the world’s great cities, so even though this is blogsincity I think every now and then I’ll share with you some stories about trips back to my hometown. And let’s face it, when you need a rest from all of the fun in LV — LA is a nice change of pace…

I once went to Vegas for a weekend and stayed for a year—that would be 2003 to 2004 the year of “Stan Lerner’s Night Tribe” at the Rio, oh what a year.

My most recent 30 straight days of partying and blogging in Sin City, well a teaser by my own standards. And while I was in LV I heard some news from LA that REGAL 14 OPENED AT LA LIVE!!!

“Not far from Rock ‘N Fish,” I thought to myself. “Not far at all. Oh, and FIDM is having a little “New Moon” party on Friday at the restaurant before the sucking kicks off. And there’s also my much older sister’s birthday to consider—Saturday night.” And then there was one more thought. “I should probably spend some time with my girlfriend who is less than thrilled…”

So I resolved to head back to the City Of Angels, although I’d been up to debauchery that would have embarrassed Heidi Fleiss back in the day—when I was dating her roommate Dianna.

Down the 15 to the 210, cut through Pasadena, down the 110, off on 9th, right on Flower, cheap parking lot—pick up girlfriend— head straight to Rock ‘N Fish meet with seriously up an coming producer, collect $150,000.00 down payment on three new projects, say goodbye to seriously up an coming producer—order Spicy Tuna Roll and Ahi Tuna with Spinach and Mac ‘n Cheese.

“Edward…Edward…Edward…Do you like Jake or Edward?” the girlfriend ranted on in a “Twilight” frenzy that alleviated all guilt for the things I had just done in Vegas.

“I’m going to head into the party. Why don’t you hang at the bar? Maybe Edward will show his glowing little face that I’d like to punch in.”

“You wouldn’t…”

I walked into the party and looked for Sarah Maxwell—who was responsible for putting together the little soirée.

I ran into Chris first. I actually met Chris and Sarah together some time ago, when Chris spotted me carrying a couple of boxes of Hygee Danishes. If you don’t know what Hygee Danish is, go to the dining section and read my blog “Let’s Hygee”, suffice it to say giving one box of this pastry crack to Chris and Sarah made us friends and business associates for life. Anyway, I was chatting with Chris about a hotel in Vegas he and his partners had just taken over when Sarah walked up.

I gave her a big hug—tempted to let my hands wander down a little bit, but noticed the girlfriend spying on me from the bar. “Where’s F’n Edward when you need him?” I mumbled.

“Wow you’re really excited about this movie,” commented Sarah, having no conception of my dilemma. “Come on you guys come mingle.”

We let Sarah go first into the sea of attractive young FIDM students. I thought about what it would be like to be in bed with all of them at the same time—then turned to Chris who nodded toward the bar area. “Drinks?”

“Good idea,” I concurred, and headed down the steps toward the much safer environment.

Amusingly, Chris decided to pull up to a spot at the bar right next to my girlfriend—whom he did not even know existed.

And in my “Rock ‘N Fish Rocks” blog I predicted that the bar at Rock ‘N Fish would be the place to hang out at LA Live—SURPRISE I WAS RIGHT!!! The bar was hopping and so was the restaurant for that matter, much more so than Katsuya or Wolfgang Puck. And I can eat and or blog anywhere I want. By the way, no offence to the original Katsuya on Ventura Blvd. which really is one of my favorite restaurants in the valley. When I was working out of Universal, I had many a good meal there.

“Drinks gentlemen?” asked Michael, the always, friendly neighborhood bartender.

“The usual,” I answered.

He set a bottle of Jack down in-between our two very large glasses partially filled with Diet Coke.

Chris did the honors and the party was on.

“You see Chris what makes blogging so powerful is the emotional connection between the writer and the reader…And the reason larger companies are having so much trouble monetizing social networks is that they don’t understand that you have to marry the right social networks to the right blogs—content is always king…” And of course I couldn’t help but to be distracted by my snooping girlfriend eleven inches south of Chris. “And Chris if you just turn around for a second I’ll introduce you to my girlfriend.”

Disclaimer: my girlfriend is young and hot, but she’s the only girl in my blogs that I’m not having sex with—something to do with her being mad about my promiscuity.

Off to the movie theatres, all 14 of them, big building, lots of people, architecture has nothing to do with the rest of LA Live, which is inexplicable, cool regional manager although not overwhelmed by the presence of world’s greatest blogger. NOTE: I’m ecstatic that there are nice movie theatres FINALLY in Downtown, but the surfaces are disappointing. Hopefully Regal will do something spectacular with the floors, walls, and lighting in the common areas of the theatre in the near future. The Grove still sets the standard for what a theatre lobby should look like and this shouldn’t be acceptable to LA Live. The movie experience once seated, however is state of the art.

“New Moon”, well it’s like watching, what when I was growing up we called an after school special. The amazingly predictable story about a 109-year-old vampire who has a thing for teenage girls…Okay, I can’t fault him for that…Bottom line is the girlfriend loved it and couldn’t wait to go home and fantasize about Edward the rest of the night.

The Next Day

Picked up the girlfriend, went to see “2012”, which is an Academy Award contender in comparison to “New Moon”. After close to three hours of watching the world come to an end I was hungry and ready to throw a nice little birthday bash for my much older sister—at Rock ‘N Fish, of course. I know I eat there a lot, but after thirty days in Vegas and another thirty on the way after Thanksgiving, I’m intent on getting my fill. For the sister and girlfriend I ordered everything on the menu…I usually get the Ahi, but I ventured into the Blackened Halibut…To really change things up I skipped on the bottle of whiskey and ordered a bottle of Conundrum—the girls loved this wine. For desert, bread pudding and lava cake, both off the hook.

I love the anything goes wildness of Las Vegas but…

Dinner and a movie…Really Rock ‘N Fish and a movie, it’s still a magical night out…Los Angeles is a movie town and I’m a movie maker (sometimes). What else can I say, this born and raised Angelino / 15 year downtownster is happy to come home and eat a great meal with friends and family, walk a few hundred feet and see a movie. It took a long time for this experience to come back to Downtown and while downtownsters need no encouragement to go try this night out—I urge the rest of my fellow Angelinos to join in. Holiday season is here, take a trip Downtown to the fashion district and do some shopping, maybe take the kids to Pershing Square for some ice skating, go to Rock ‘N Fish or some of the other great Downtown restaurants and have a dinner you’ll never forget—and then go see a movie. It’s been a challenging year, so we all deserve a night out Downtown.

DISCOVERING PLEASURES AT TREASURES

Stan Lerner — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 19:43:38 +0000

It had been a long day of wine tasting at the Hilton, literally more than a thousand wines to choose from. And there was Billy O’ Rourke’s new tequila served by hot girls via cold ice luge—you get the picture. So later as I sat at the Circle Bar at the Hard Rock Hotel one can easily understand why I might be content to sit and watch Fedor knock out yet another MMA opponent. I can’t wait to see Brock Lesnar and Fedor come to blows, my money will be on Fedor who doesn’t bother with product endorsements, although his right hand might just be the cure for Brock’s foot in the mouth disorder. Anyway, I just wanted to sit, drink (more) and watch the fight.

“I have no interest in watching MMA, let’s roll to Hofbrauhaus and drink some beer and…” said my buddy Isaiah, an exec. at The Venetian.

“You go, I’m watching the fight. I’ll come over when it’s done.”

So I’m talking to Ken the dentist visiting from San Diego to my left when a kid, by kid I mean 22-year-old, pulls up next to me in the seat Isaiah had just vacated. I was hoping for someone of the female variety, obviously, but he seemed decent enough. I was slightly alarmed that he ordered a beer rather than a real drink, like Ken and I, but I reminded myself that the youth of today, well let’s face it, they’re little girls when it comes to vice. Anyway, I included him in the fight conversation with Ken and unlike my buddy Isaiah he did indeed have an interest in some good old ass kicking.

“So what is there to do around here,” he asked.

“This is Vegas, what is there not to do?” I responded. “You’re not from around here are you?”

“I’m from Sweden, I’ve been here for four hours…”

“You’ve never been to Vegas before?” He shook his head. And that’s when I notice two average looking young girls eyeing me, they had “college kids playing hooker in Vegas” written all over them—so I waved them over. I figure that I don’t really give as much money as I should to charity, but I make up for it by helping kids like these two get through school. And since I was feeling particularly philanthropic I nodded toward my new friend from Sweden, thinking that he might like to get a proper start in Vegas.

“So do you want to go up to your room and get naked, the four of us?” asked part time college hooker number one.

They did a little whispering in Sweden’s ear.

“I’m just a student…” he uttered, nervously.

“They looked at me. “I’m trying to watch a fight here.” They left and I turned to Sweden. “How much did they want?”

“Six hundred, for both.”

“They were worth three hundred each all day long. If I didn’t just do a threesome at the Hilton I would have picked up the check.”

“How did you know they were…uh…uh…”

“Pros. I’ve been coming to Vegas since I’m three and I own blogsincity—it’s my job to know these things.”

“I want your job…” he sighed, then continued. “My friend that I came with fell asleep up in the room and I lost a hundred and twenty gambling.”

I’m such a sucker for a sob story and let’s face it blogsincity is kind of an unofficial ambassador. “Do you like gentlemen’s clubs?”

“I love strip clubs,” he answered, his face aglow.

Fedor caught Brett Rogers with a right in the second, down went Rogers. “C’mon I’ll take you to the best gentlemen’s club you’ve ever been to.”

I called Treasures to let them know I was on my way. They offered to send the limo for me, but I was feeling okay to drive.

A Few Minutes Later

“This is your car?”

I nodded. “Beats the hell out of a Saab, doesn’t it.”

“I can’t believe this…It’s like a dream. I come to American and now I’m hanging out with a famous writer—and driving in this car, this is crazy man.”

And then, top down, I rolled toward Treasures with Sweden riding shotgun, which I hoped would not be too upsetting to the ghost of Howard Hughes, who’s grown accustomed to the seat. If Sweden only knew the company he was really keeping.

Now given that there is no vice, which doesn’t hold some interest for me, I think of gentlemen’s clubs as the closest I’m ever going to come to good clean fun. And for the distinguishing gentleman there is no club as distinctly elegant as Treasures. There is a time and place for clubs with fully nude eighteen-year-olds and clubs with a bunch of young lasses that look like they’ve jumped from the pages of Playboy onto your lap, but given that I’m pretty sure that Sweden is in Europe, geography is not my thing, I felt that the European feel and vibe of Treasures was just what the fight doctor ordered for my young friend.

I said hi to Alson, Nick, and my old buddy Jacko Smiley, all of whom I’ve known since the days of producing “Stan Lerner’s Night Tribe” at the Rio Hotel and Casino. It’s always good to see the boys and even better to sit at my table—that would be table 37 for my readers who enjoy excessive details. Jacko, who always knows just what I’m looking for, sent what I term my Mrs. Rights—two of them anyway. Both Riley and Mercedes are what dreams filled with precipitation are made of. My hart warmed as Mercedes took Sweden off for a VIP adventure. And I have to admit that I was almost overwhelmed by the thought of what it must be like to be a proud father, and yes it’s a reoccurring theme of this blog, but I really think I’d make the coolest dad ever.

“I wish you were my uncle or something,” said Sweden.

I held back tears. “Hey, it’s no big deal. I just wanted you to have a good impression of America and Americans—you can’t believe all the bad press we get.”

“What are you talking about? I’m going to move here when I’m done with school. This has been the best night of my life. And I’m going to tell everyone in Sweden about your blog…Maybe I can work for you.”

I raised Jack and Coke number twenty. “I’ll drink to that. But if you want to work for me you better never let a two for six hundred hooker deal get away.” We laughed and toasted.

“I promise boss, never again.”

“You hungry? Because in Vegas, if you roll with me, breakfast is always around three or four. Of course sometimes it has to be room service, if you know what I mean.”

“I’m up for anything.”

So I took junior for a ride down the strip to the Bellagio for breakfast feeling good about doing a good deed. See good deeds are like bouncing a ball, you put your hands on it for a moment, send it the best direction you know, and then you just never know where that ball bounces to—hopefully to a great place.

And although I usually just stick to storytelling, I enjoyed taking Sweden to Treasures so much, I’m going to make this a part of blogsincity’s mission statement. I have a bottle table at Treasures every Tuesday and Saturday—late night. If any blogsincity readers want to join the party just text me at 213 400-4559 and let me know. You can ride in the limo with my posse and you won’t have to pay to get in—but the Mrs. Rights are on you!!!